The journal of fail...

Most of Tuesday was spent (re)playing Final Fantasy XII, and trying to work out where my new-found cold had come from.

Most of Wednesday was spent reading TV Tropes while trying to do other things. Of course, when I went to bed, I didn't have anything else to do, so I read TV Tropes solidly from 9pm to 6am. I only got through the list of gaming tropes.

Yesterday, after two hours sleep, I went back to Final Fantasy XII, but left my phone upstairs so I wouldn't end up reading TV Tropes again. I also watched some stuff, and made food to put in the freezer. By the time I actually got online, I was so tired I couldn't type and was beyond making sense anyway.

A full night's sleep later, I both feel like hell and don't make much sense. And I have to go to volunteering today, which is going to be funny as all hell, because the cold has blocked my ears up and I can hear even less than usual. And all I wanna do is sleeeeeeeeeeep, but I need to go in the bath before volunteering, and sleeping in the bath is a bad idea (don't do it kids!), so I guess I'll have to caffeine my way through the day, which will be fun because I don't react normally to caffeine, as anyone who has ever seen me on caffeine will be able to tell you, and me being tired while on caffeine (which, at this point, doesn't even look like a word anymore) is probably enough to get me arrested, considering how hyper I get when I'm forcing myself to be awake when I'm tired, and this is getting to be a long sentence, so I'll put a full stop here.

So yes, that's why I've not been around lately.

You know what eats up all your internet time? Deciding to re-play Final Fantasy 12. Because I'm that clever.

Other than that, not much has happened. I got a parcel from red_trillium on Tuesday, which was wonderful, thanks so much! Everyone loves the bandana, because it is pretty.

I'm at leanwellback and fizzyblogic's for the weekend, which has mostly involved being floored by how adorable their cat is. Because he is that adorable. Really.

Ummm... That's all I can think of right now. Probably because I haven't had breakfast yet. I should do that.

I was going to talk about all the gender-related fail I've come across in the last few days, but then I came across this macro and, magically, everything's better:


^_^

Also, you know what? Signing up for areyougame was a Bad Idea. Or at the very least, I should have stuck with the one prompt that I was sure I could do something with. Even that one didn't get much of a reception (although I'm about to link to it in every community that I can think of, and have already managed to get it included in the Transfic master list, which proves that I'm good at selling stuff at least), and I'm still unsure if "very interesting" is a compliment or not. I'm also going to link the hell out of the third fic I posted there, for reasons of MOAR GIRLSLASH - Final Fantasy XII has many pretty (and easily slashable) boys, so the girls seem to get left out. Or at least, that's how I see it. I'm hoping that no-one ever finds the second fic I posted to that community, because it was awful and should be allowed to die with some dignity, so I won't be linking to that, ever.

Not bad going, you're probably thinking. Yet I've just had to give up on the other two prompts I claimed (don't worry, I told the mod, although there doesn't seem to be any precedent for it in that community o.o), because I can't get them to work at all. And one of them was my own freaking prompt, so it's not like I haven't had time to work on it.

I'm just frustrated, you know? I would like, for once, just to get through a full fic challenge without having to apologise to the mods for not completing everything (or not completing it at all in one case). Either that or I should learn to accept that I am not made for fic challenges, and learn to just write my own ideas at my own pace.

And I have lots of ideas. Oh man, do I.

( Specific fic bunnies )
( Vague fic ideas )

So, do you have any fic ideas going on right now that you'd like to talk about?

There were loads of things I was meant to do this weekend. None of them happened.

In a vague attempt at fixing this, here's my to do list for this week:

• Go to the volunteering interview at the Hospice (2 June - 1:30pm)


• Write a review for gay_also_means_happy¹


• Stop listening to See My Baby Jive by Wizzard on repeat every time I go on the computer


• Get rid of Resident Evil: Outbreak²


• Attempt to find a copy of Gitaroo Man for the PS2


• Go to James and Patrick's at the weekend


• Choose which film to buy next from my Gay Films To Buy List


• Catch up with the banners at fortycakes


• Write the last part of my fic for fortycakes


• Buy something to help with the hayfever I've somehow ended up with this year

I think we all know that I'll actually be lucky just to remember to do half of this. Oh well.



¹You'd think that, with owning a DVD of D.E.B.S, I'd be doing a review of that. I might yet do so, but I could probably write a better review of But I'm A Cheerleader or The Birdcage, which I haven't seen in months. I last watched D.E.B.S on Sunday - it shouldn't be that difficult to write a review for, but it somehow is, and it's driving me nuts.
²It's a good game, but I'm not good enough in that genre to actually finish the game 100%, which is also driving me nuts. But then again, I got it for £3 from a charity shop, so I can't complain.

I ended up getting my mobile phone's internet cut off last night.

Really, it's for my own good - I can't afford to keep it. I'm meant to pay £60 this month when without internet that sum would be ~£35. I don't think I even have £60 to spare this month, and that's before I even think about getting a winter coat.




I have, however, finished mucking around with my layout. Finally. Which means I can finally get on with those icons I want to damn well finish. Or, you know, keep playing Final Fantasy 12 until I've renamed all the Espers. Adrammelech is still the Mega Ultra Chicken.




Note to self: Girly TMI filter. NOW.

I may have watched too much Yu-Gi-Oh The Abridged Series and played too much LEGO Batman this weekend at Jay and James' place. So much of the latter that I really really want this, or at least just the Harley figure. Because hitting LEGO people over the head with a giant mallet? Huge amounts of fun.

I wouldn't be surprised if James told me he wanted this. Ages 7-12 my backside.

Other than that, not much more I can say, other than why do people insist on having Christmas lights up this early?


[Edit] I actually had a lot more to say, but computer time ran out. So I will say it now.

I'm officially spending Christmas with Jay and family. Well, semi-officially, I haven't told my parents this yet. I just need a Christmas where I'm not constantly feeling torn between different parts of my own family, and get to do whatever I want. And that includes making gingerbread and Christmas cake. And flapjacks. Because I'm Batman I can.

It's probably going to upset my parents a bit, but I really don't think I could survive a Christmas with my family this year. I know that sounds harsh, but split-family Christmases are not fun. That's my opinion and I'm sticking to it.

I think I've finally caught up on most comments¹, but there's a good chance I've missed some because I'm not all that clever. I've already started taking some pictures that people suggested from that post, and will post them either tomorrow or Thursday, because the library is shut on Wednesday for training or something.



¹But not those to the really horrible entry. I just can't.

Super Sekrit Note to Jay and James: Go here, and read the section Harley & Ivy. Last section of that section. Even Paul Dini agrees.

Seriously, I just finished all three of the Phoenix Wright games. It would have gone alot quicker if I hadn't have lost the first one for a month. And now I have to wait till 9th May(?) for the Apollo Justice game, which gives me a good while to finish Final Fantasy 3 & Revenant Wings. Just a bit to do.

In other news, Dara O' Briain IS coming to Middlesbrough. This I must get a ticket for. I must also find where I put my Frankie Boyle ticket...

Lush products are brilliant. I can't stop smelling my own hair, which might not be such a good thing.

Oh, and I need to make more bread. My granddad's eaten most of the loaf I made last night.

So, last night, fun! And interesting!

One of the kids, the older one, has changed dramatically since the last time I saw him. His mum recently left and the whole family's had a hard time of it since, but he's really risen up to the challenge. He's now someone I can actually talk to without feeling like he's trying to show off. He even let me play on his Nintendo DS, and gave me actual hints instead of doing everything for me. He tidied up. He asked me how things were going and why I wasn't at uni, and when I said I'd had a breakdown, he understood and didn't ask any more about it.

The I'm-better-than-you attitude he's had for pretty much the whole nearly-14 years I've known him is gone. And his dad is so proud of him. And I'm proud to have him as part of my (extended) family.

Oh and I played that Metroid Prime game on the Wii, ate pizza, and had to tell the younger kid (who happens to be SEVEN) that she couldn't watch the previews on Playboy TV. Or Gay TV either.

That and we had about a minute of snow straight after a night of heavy rain. So I've finally got hold of some Christmassy songs (Fairytale Of New York FTW!)

I'm practically crying. I just found a stash of music from the game "Gitaroo Man", and now I'm practically crying over "The Legendary Theme" (which, I think, was level 6 in the game - otherwise known as the lulliby level). It is so prettyful. The rest of the soundtrack is pretty good too, don't get me wrong, but this is just... Woah. This is my new "if I ever get married, I want this to be my first dance" song.

Gamer geek am I. Oh yes. Mayhaps a gamer geek fangirl possibly even.

I forgot to mention - I also have Final Fantasy music! Me is a happy gamer geek ^_^

Today I have done... Nothing. Except eat. And play NFSU. And complain about alot of back pain...

So tomorrow's the first day at Barnsley Primark, which could be a unsolisitated disaster. Having already worked in one Primark, I should get used to things quite quickly tho...

The operative word in that last sentance being should...

I don't think there's much more to say... So I'm off to sleep...

Night all.